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雅思小作文写作攻略

2018-08-02

编辑:津桥国际学院

摘要: 图表写作是雅思独有的一种考试模式,想要拿到高分,除了要多多练习以外,还要吃透它的评分标准。小作文的评分标准是:任务完成,连贯与衔接,词汇和语法的准确性以及多样性...

本文关键词:

 

图表写作是雅思独有的一种考试模式,想要拿到高分,除了要多多练习以外,还要吃透它的评分标准。

小作文的评分标准是:任务完成,连贯与衔接,词汇和语法的准确性以及多样性。每项各以九分制依次打分,最后取平均分。

如下是剑桥雅思系列提供的一份5.5分的图表作文,我们来一起分析一下学生的失分点在哪儿。

 

Different countries’ consumer spending are quite different. The table shows the vary consumer spending on a series of items in the five countries, namely, the Ireland, Italy, Span, Sweden and Turkey in 2002.

Food, drinks and tobacco were in the most important position on consumer spending in all of the five countries, and in a different percentage. In Ireland and turkey, they were near 30%, while in the other three countries they are under 20%.

Clothing and footwear were the second important consumer spending in these countries. In Italy, they got 9%, and in Sweden, they were 5.4%. In the other three countries, the figure were very similar, all were near 6.5%.

The last consumer spending were leisure and education. In Turkey, they were 4.35%, and in the other four countries the figure were under 4%.

In conclusion, it can be said that in 2002, food ,drinks and tobacco were the most important consumer spending in the five countries, and the different countries’ consumer spending were quite different.

考官点评如下:

  1. 本文集中描写了核心信息,把国家进行归类,使用了支持性的数据,并进行概括总结。但是,文中没有清楚地提到这些百分比代表什么,也需要进一步展开叙述核心对比。

 

考官这一项的点评针对的是任务完成。在这一项中,学生原则性的错误没有犯,也就是说有关于衣,食,教育的核心信息都一一呈现出来了,但是对于数据的描述偏孤立,没有把它们合理的联系在一起,或者说联系在一起的意向并不强烈,这也就失去了小作文的写作意义。

比如:The last consumer spending were leisure and education. In Turkey, they were 4.35%, and in the other four countries the figure were under 4%.可改为Cost on leisure and education went the last. Turkey came again in the first place at 4.35%, roughly two times the figure of Ireland (2.21%) and Spain (1.98%). The further 3.22% and 3.20% were made by Sweden and Italy.

就“任务完成”的评分标准而言,学生在这一项上的得分为6分。

  1. 考生通过标志词和一些有效的指代和关联组织文章,虽然并非所有的观点都是清晰地关联在一起的,而且结尾有重复。

考官这一项的点评针对的是连贯与衔接。连贯指的是文章的段落结构。考生结构清晰,但是在衔接上的错误就比较明显了。比如: In Italy, they got 9%, and in Sweden, they were 5.4%. 在这两个数据表达中,9%和5.4%的关系不够清晰,可用最高值和最低值的对比关系将二者联系在一起。除此之外,文章的结尾也没有起到总结全文数据特征的作用。

就“连贯与衔接”的评分标准而言,学生在这一项上的得分为6分。

  1. 词汇量相当有限,刚能满足要求。对题目文字的变换表明用词不够灵活。有一些拼写和词形方面的错误,而且多处重复。同样,句型缺乏变化,几乎没有什么复杂结构。不过,除了基本语法方面的一两个错误,简单结构用得比较准确,也易于理解。

考官这一项的点评针对的是“词汇和语法的准确性以及多样性”。学生的词汇和语法功底都比较浅薄,只能在最低层面满足语言要求,故在这两项上的得分均为5分。

综合以上评分,学生本篇小作文的得分为5.5分。

 

现就以上四项评分标准,给出我的范文:

The table suggests information in terms of the percentage of national consumer expenditure on different items in five different countries in 2002.

As shown in the first list, food, drinks and tobacco constituted the largest proportion of national consumer expenditure. Turkey spent the highest outgoings on diet and cigarettes, accounting 32.14% of their total expenditure. Ireland followed the second, with money spent in this item taking at 28.91%. The proportion of Spain, Italy and Sweden was similar, constituting at 18.80%, 16.36% and 15.77% accordingly.

The expense contributed to clothing and footwear was much less. Italy had the highest percentage at 9% while the figures of the remaining four countries were lower than 7%.

 Cost on leisure and education went the last. Turkey came again in the first place at 4.35%, roughly two times the figure of Ireland (2.21%) and Spain (1.98%). The further 3.22% and 3.20% were made by Sweden and Italy.

In conclusion, people spend most of their income on food and clothing; Turkey had the largest percentage of expenditure on these three items in comparison with the other four countries.

老师在日常的雅思写作教学中,一定要认真研究评分标准并贯彻到学生的写作学习和批改中,才能真正把握教学方向,让学生水到渠成的出分。

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